“Letting go of the pain means letting go of you; But I know I’ll be better when I begin.” Natalie Woods - Breathing Smoke

https://open.spotify.com/embed/track/1hL4LPp2ZaveONV3636tvK?utm_source=generator

It’s Ramiel’s last night in London. After battling it for so long, tonight he finally decides to stay at the stone-house —their house. Andrew offered to accompany him, but he refused. Tonight may be the only time, and the last time, for him to be here; before this place belongs to someone new. Yes, Eden’s family’s finally agreed to sell the house and they’ve found a buyer immediately. Turned out, a family from their block had been eyeing this property for a while.

There’s no big change inside the house; they kept it intact, aside from all the plants. Grace said someone cleaned the house once in a week, so it’s quite clean and properly maintained. Sometimes when a family comes to visit, Grace and Oliver —Eden’s dad—would sleep here at the stone-house while the guest occupies the main house.

Ramiel walks slowly towards the living room. He tries really hard to dim the old scenes inside his head, but it’s hard—he blames his photographic memory for that. He can see himself sitting alone in the living room, hugging Eden’s favorite sweater. He closes his eyes, and the scene vanishes.

You can do this, he says to himself.

He finally gathers all his courage and walks towards the main bedroom. Everything stays at its original places; Grace only emptied the wardrobe and gave away all of Eden’s clothes to the orphanage. A framed picture of them is still hanging above the bed, and everything still smells of her even after all these years. He approaches her side of the bed, and opens the drawer on the bedside table. Some of her belongings are still there; some keys he didn’t recognize, movie tickets, a small journal, and dried flowers contained inside a crystal compartment. He picks up the journal and starts flicking through it.

Ramiel’s hand hangs in the air. He’s completely forgetting the fact that Eden did donate her eyes —everything after her death became blurry inside his head, and maybe it’s his body’s defense mechanism coz it knows whenever a thought of her —especially during her death— hurts Ramiel’s whole body. He developed anxiety, a mild depression and he started to lose memories after losing Eden. Coming back here, to this house, starts to bring those memories back.

He wonders who received Eden’s eyes? He reaches for his phone and makes some calls. He needs to find them soon. He needs to look at those eyes one last time —before he finally bids his last goodbye.